Yep....I'm still here. This could take a while. I didnt make that Skeleton by the way!Last time round my head was hurting after watching various people scratch their heads & slowly skulk into a corner hoping that no one noticed after trying to take measurements from the Frankenquin with, of all things, a broken retractable tape measure that had been stuck back together with gaffa tape.
Then for some unknown reason Joey asked me if we should do a lifecast. Thank god. If this was being done properly with a suitable budget then the first thing we'd have done is a lifecast of the people who have got to wear this stuff. That way we could ensure that each suit would fit its respective wearer perfectly. That idea had been abondoned very early on due to lack of funds & actors to wear the armour. Recently Jobin has seemed to gain access to more money. Right at the start their whole budget was £500 now the
y just seem to be buying stuff all the time. I dont know where its coming from & I probably dont want to.So lifecasting then. Theres loads of different casts you can do depending on what you want. If you want a detailed cast of someones head then you basically cover their whole head in dental alginate & then put a plaster bandage jacket on it. When its removed you fill it with plaster & when thats set you remove the bandages & the alginate & piff paff poof you have a plaster head of the person. Theres a bit more to it obviously but nows not the time to be typing out step by step guides.
We would r
equire a full body cast. We didn't want all the skin detail as we just wanted a body shape for me to sculpt onto. Therefore we just needed some plaster bandage. OK deep breath. This is the jist of how it works. The person to be cast gets given a skin tight lycra suit to wear. This is then coated with vaseline to help take the bandages off at the end. The person then stands with their arms out to either side (you have them hold onto supports that are at the right height - the pose is slightly different for creature suit casts but fuck that - theres no time to explain). Mod-roc plaster bandage (what they use at hospital to wrap your broken limbs) is applied to the front & back butting together centrally down either side. When its set you seperate the two halves & then usually fibreglass into these to get a cast of the body. Thats it really. Kind of. For a full body cast you would usually have as many as 5 or 6 people doing it to make it quicker. Some people really dont like it. It can be claustrophobic especially
if your head is encased & panic attacks are not uncommon. Most people dont mind it though & find it relaxing. Anyway I only had Paul & Robin to help me. With 3 people that know what theyre doing its still a bit tight. We had 1 guy who knew what he was doing but hadn't done a lifecast for a couple of years (me) 1 guy who kind of knew the basics but had never done a full body (Paul) & 1 guy who had no idea what we were saying (Robin). We had a volunteer for the process too. Some dude who was keen to experience being encased in plaster. He was the right kind of build that Joey was looking for so I carefuly explained the process to him ensuring that he knew what he was letting himself in for. He was fine with it. We arranged for him to come in the next day & we went to hobbycraft to get some shit.The next day I arrived in high spirits pleased to be getting an actual human body to cast & thus work on. I prepared the materials with Robins help. This consisted of him opening the box & getting out some bandage strips & then just buggering off. Not a problem, it'd be quicker without him anyway! Then I was informed that Paul couldnt make it in due to some doctors appointment or something. Fuck. It was just me & Robin now. Not good. Right fuck it he's just going to have to learn stuff really quickly. Our "subject" Dave arrived. Everything was ready so I asked him to put the lycra suit on. "Can I keep my clothes on?" Eh? He had suddenly become shy & refused to put the lycra suit on. He insisted that he remained clothed. I explained that A) his clothes would get fucked B) he would bake to death C) it would be virtually impossible to get a decent cast done D) he said he was alright with it yesterday.
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOONGGGGGG negotiations finally led to him agreeing to wearing his shorts (not proper shorts. Those 3/4 length pirate ones. Whats the point?) his t-shirt & a vest
over that (fuck knows). The look was completed with a vigourous wrapping of the subject in cling film. Holy fucking jesus. Everything about this was wrong. I cant believe we did it. Clothes & cling film & a nice plaster suit. He'd be lucky to not have a stroke from the temperature. Anyway we began what we should have never started. I'll be brief. About half way through Dave started feeling woozy which was hardly surprising. He asked for a drink so I asked Robin to get him some water. Dave demanded pepsi which isn't really what you need. I watched in horror as Robin poured the fizzy piss down Dave's gullet. I knew what was coming. Two slight convulsions heralded the tsunami of frothy bile as it spewed forth as if from the wretched arse of Satan himself. Luckily most of it went into the bucket of water we'd been using to wet the bandages. Obviously the action of spewing had caused him to lurch out of the half finished mould rendering it useless. Tut. Theres nothing you can do though. At the end of the day the comfort & needs of the person youre casting overide everything. If they want to get out you get them out fast. Not to worry. We've got another volunteer - Mike! from Romania who doesnt really speak english but wanted a go. I made sure he fully understood what we needed to do. He was cool with it & besides...... he had just seen his mate barf himself inside out onto the floor so I took his word for it. Tomorrow then!Half the trick to a decent life cast is making sure the person is totally at ease. Anything you can do to make them as comfortable as possible is a benefit. Music is the easiest method. I'd asked Joey to hook his increasingly dusty laptop up to some speakers. Mike had no preferences so it was left on shuffle. Today I had Paul helping me & I must say that everything was running perfectly. I've done a few life casts at proffessional companies before but the one we were doing now was better than any of them. Wicked. Mike was loving it & all was well. The music was a bit annoying due to Joeys tinny little speakers. It then shuffled to the theme of the new Star Trek film & Joey turned it up. The music itself was fine but it was to loud for his shitty speakers & it sounded awful. I asked him to turn it down at which point his phone rang & he left the room. Mike was pulling faces & asked for the music to stop. Paul was closest but hesitant to touch the laptop with his soaking
, plaster encrusted hands for a fraction of a second. All the time that was needed for Mike to suddenly turn from the worlds nicest guy into a possesed beast of chaos. He ripped himself out of the mould. He looked like fucking Mumm-Ra in mid transformation. For a brief moment I wondered if I was about to get my head kicked in by a mad Romanian in his pants with wet bandages sloughing off him. He didnt though. Instead he stumbled over to a chair & sat down. Guess he doesnt like Star Trek.He doesnt know what happened. One minute he was fine then all of a sudden he thought he was going to black out & freaked out. He was very apologetic but I told him not to worry about it. Shame though as we would have been finished in 5 more minutes. Joey had decided that Mike had the perfect proportions for the suit but understandably Mike wasnt keen on another life cast, lest Mumm-Ra be unleashed once again. Robin came up with drawing round him with a pen & then I would use the measurements to sculpt from. I let him do it so he could be made to see for himself why it was silly. And I could do with some light relief for a moment. I sat back & watched. The resulting piece has been entitled by myself as "Fucked up Morph". Some drunken expert would probably pay handsomely for such a work. " I love how youve become embarrased upon approaching his testicles & left th
em out. It really speaks to hetrosexual man.......you could probably gauge a mans attitude towards other male genetalia by seeing how far up the inside of the thighs the pen mark reaches... challenging the taboo whil..... more wine? Thankyou I will"We were back where we started. Frankenquin loomed in the corner. If he had a head he might have looked worried.......or been able to locate the door so he could escape.
Next time:
- Workshop becomes casting couch, interview room, commitee hall, board room & youth club
- I finally show you some photos of cool new armour sculpture
See ya later,
Michael
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